Shit I (Almost) Say

This past week, I worked on a project that involved replacing old math code in an online learning environment with LaTex equivalents. Believe it or not, that really was fun.

I took a break to email a client about something and they respond. I respond a bit later and tell them I’d do [activity] as soon as…and here is the shit I almost say part…

As soon as I finish with this brand spanking new LaTeX.

The problem there was that I had no idea if they knew that LaTeX is coding…I mean, the other spelling is latex. You know, Catwoman style. And then I also would have brought up spankings. And that might have gotten weird.

Gee, how could that have ever gone wrong…

Advertisements

Shit I Say: Part 1

Today, I’m writing about medical technology licensing. Just a few minutes ago, I showed Bull the hives that resurfaced on my elbows, upper arms, upper legs, and small of my back. I told him that right after I got out of the bath tub (colloidal oatmeal bath), that I felt cold and that I turned off the AC in our bedroom. He noticed the goosebumps on my legs and we had the following conversation:

Bull: I see goosebumps on your legs. You’re either cold or demon possessed.

Me: If I were demon possessed, I wouldn’t sell my soul to just one demon. I’d take a page from the medical technology licensing playbook. I’d license out the use of my soul to multiple demons. And they have to renew monthly…like a subscription box.

Bull: …

Me: What? I like to ensure my ROI is stellar. My soul would be the investment. I want the best return possible.

In other news, I’m clearly wearing long sleeves to officiate a wedding tomorrow…the high is supposed to be 98. And this is Oklahoma. Thankfully, it’s before noon and they want something short.