The coolest thing that starting my business has done for me is that it allowed me to just learn to be me.
I started my business during a time of great adversity for me. I was a survivor of domestic violence in a state where it was (and is) legal to fire someone from their job (despite having a VPO). I had to learn who I was, how to run a business with children at home (one with special needs), how to live with complex PTSD, and ultimately how to live a fulfilled life while living with SLE/MCTD.
Starting a Copywriting Business Gave Me Job Security
When people think about working for themselves, they get trapped in fear. Where will they find clients? Where will they get money if they can’t find work? How will they pay their bills? I get that. I kept two part-time jobs and dropped them one at a time as I filled up my roster. And in 2021 while I was super sick, I brought on Jami to help keep the ship from sinking.
For me living in a state where it is legal to fire someone who is a victim or survivor of domestic violence? If I did not work for myself in some way, I would never have job security because he was calling the college I taught at and attempting to get me fired. I can’t tell you how many times I had to go into the Director of Education’s office and take all of my court documents with me and also talk to the Legal Department and essentially defend myself. And for what? I was the victim. And the DOE? He was a lawyer. I was being victimized over and over.
Being self-employed, I can’t fire myself. I’ve made it a mission to survive. I’ve been a survivor my entire life. I remember once when I was about four and my older brother was about nine. My mom had overdosed on drugs. My dad was working for the railroad. We lived in El Reno, Oklahoma. On Barker Street. My brother and I walked from Barker Street at night all the way to Mayhan Street which was across town to our great-grandmother’s home. Mom was fine if you’re wondering (she still hasn’t laid off the drugs despite her age). The ambulance was there. I remember the lights. I vaguely remember the police or fire department or someone telling us to stay home. I was terrified and wanted Papa (that’s what we called our great-grandma) and Glen, my brother, couldn’t calm me down. So we walked. We walked that town a lot. My guess is he knew if he didn’t walk with me, I would have probably tried to go by myself. That was in the early 80s. Life was very different then.
Anyway…Glen and I had a very…adventurous childhood to say the least. And by adventurous I mean we raised ourselves along with our two cousins who lived with us for some time.
Our parents didn’t exactly hold down jobs or have enough money to pay bills or buy food. So, job security has always been a big deal to me. Starting my own copywriting business, especially as a domestic violence survivor, gave me job security. You cannot fire yourself.
I Cultivated a Beautiful, Peaceful Life with My Family
I remarried. My two biological children (now adults) also learned a lot, too, over the last few years. My now-adopted son (special needs) has learned a lot over the last 10 years in his own right and thrives beautifully by living in a safe, loving environment with mommy and daddy…and with two adult brothers who love him and visit him. He is my husband’s biological son. I have the privilege of now being his legal mom. And I am happy to be that.
I have a healthy, vibrant, loving, peaceful marriage. We do things together and are healthy enough to also do our own things. We don’t yell, scream, or accuse each other of things. We’re just happy. We’re peaceful. We help each other. We love each other. We support each other. We are the image that we want our children to see if and when they decide to settle down. We’ve been together 10 years this year, married nine. He’s my Prince Charming.
Don’t ever let anyone tell you, including yourself, that you’re too “broken” to make it happen. You CAN do it, whether it is starting a copywriting business or doing something else.