Shit I (Almost) Say

This past week, I worked on a project that involved replacing old math code in an online learning environment with LaTex equivalents. Believe it or not, that really was fun.

I took a break to email a client about something and they respond. I respond a bit later and tell them I’d do [activity] as soon as…and here is the shit I almost say part…

As soon as I finish with this brand spanking new LaTeX.

The problem there was that I had no idea if they knew that LaTeX is coding…I mean, the other spelling is latex. You know, Catwoman style. And then I also would have brought up spankings. And that might have gotten weird.

Gee, how could that have ever gone wrong…

Shit I Say: Part 1

Today, I’m writing about medical technology licensing. Just a few minutes ago, I showed Bull the hives that resurfaced on my elbows, upper arms, upper legs, and small of my back. I told him that right after I got out of the bath tub (colloidal oatmeal bath), that I felt cold and that I turned off the AC in our bedroom. He noticed the goosebumps on my legs and we had the following conversation:

Bull: I see goosebumps on your legs. You’re either cold or demon possessed.

Me: If I were demon possessed, I wouldn’t sell my soul to just one demon. I’d take a page from the medical technology licensing playbook. I’d license out the use of my soul to multiple demons. And they have to renew monthly…like a subscription box.

Bull: …

Me: What? I like to ensure my ROI is stellar. My soul would be the investment. I want the best return possible.

In other news, I’m clearly wearing long sleeves to officiate a wedding tomorrow…the high is supposed to be 98. And this is Oklahoma. Thankfully, it’s before noon and they want something short.

Awkward Conversation with Virtual Doc

Yall. My skin is raw. Skeeter Syndrome continues…the hives never seem to fully heal. No matter what I use, it doesn’t seem to repel the bugs or make my skin less hateful. So, tonight I bit the bullet to see a virtual doctor. Why? Because it’s $25 even without insurance. And it’s just hives. Nothing is infected. I just want to know if there is anything else I should be doing.

So, I sat here waiting…and my screen says the visit usually starts in ten minutes or less and no one in front of me in the virtual waiting room. Okay, cool. I figured I had time to add some client topics to my to-do list for late this week / early next week. I mean, that seems reasonable.

I never heard my phone ding or otherwise alert me. And my phone was just to the right of my laptop so I could see it out of the corner of my eye as I waited. I never noticed a change.

Me saying the topic out loud that was requested by an estate planning client: Should you plan your funeral?

Voice from the phone: Excuse me?

Me: Oh, shit, I didn’t realize you were there. I’m sorry, that was an awkward introduction. I am a professional copywriter and blogger. I work with a lot of lawyers. I was adding some titles and ideas from an estate planning lawyer I work with.

Dr: …..

Me: What? Is it really that hard for you to accept that I work from home as a copywriter since I’m doing a virtual visit with a doctor? I promise I’m not a murderer.

Awkward….seriously, where the hell is #lawtwitter to back me up when I need it? Holy hell…

It’s Been a Long Couple of Weeks

Trying to get back into the swing of things with work and my life. The last two weeks are indicative of why I say to people that they are under no obligation to live their lives under the terms of people who know them. It doesn’t matter if they are blood related.

It’s Important to Say No

It doesn’t matter if you’re 18, 28, 38, 48, anywhere in between, or older. Saying no is important. We can all think of at least one person who if we say yes to one thing, they add on three more things, five more things, 25 more things…that it can never be enough. Regardless of what you do for them and what you have to ignore, put on the back burner, or otherwise give up.

Learn to mute your notifications on your phone. Learn and do what is best for your mental health because you are important, too.

10% Done with Morning Meltdown 100

Despite all of the ridiculousness of the last two weeks that I won’t continue to give my time or energy to, my workouts have continued. Today was workout #10. That’s 10% of 100. I’m down to 125 pounds, but some of that is likely stress from the last few weeks.

So, I’m alive. I’m trying to get back on track with everything else. Bull has been a real trooper when it comes to supporting me and helping me. I managed to dislocate my right shoulder (again). Recovering from that, too.

Morning Meltdown 2/100

Well, this morning was workout 2 out of 100. So, you know…2%. It was upper body. I am not a big fan of upper body because of issues with both shoulders. My right shoulder has been an issue for 21 years. Around 16 years ago, I had steroid shots in it for a congenital shoulder deformity. Most in my family have a version of it, including my biological children.

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